Well you are not alone. Last week I was denied visa to travel to Finland. I immediately felt like this was yet another failure on my part. One time I got admission I applied to University and just when the admission came, I could not get money for tuition so I never enrolled. A fiend told me about tuition free universities in Finland and immediately I took interest and applied. I did everything just to make sure I had what they needed to gain admission. I took IELTS and passed, did the entrance exams and passed and I was granted admission. I was so elated that finally me dream of going to College was almost a reality. The resident permit application process proved not to be a walk in the park. Very few people were willing to help but nevertheless I got two people who helped and finally I was ready for the interview at the embassy. After two months of waiting, the decision finally came. As I sat in that small room with the visa office, my heart was pounding. I had faith I would get the permit but the possibility of being denied was also playing in my mind. "Your decision is here and the immigration service will not be granting you the resident permit." This are the word that sent my heart right to my stomach in shock and disappointed. It was 5 minutes of feeling so disappointed, sad and hopeless. Something suddenly clicked within me and the next words I was uttering to myself were "Thank you God, I know your will has prevailed." Immediately I spoke this words, every negative feeling I had before disappeared. I was ready to get up and go. Its like I was so energized to move on to another challenge.
After almost not being able to finish high school, years of jobs that have not been paying well, numerous attempts to get into college and failing, one must surely feel like a failure. Well I realized I only become a failure if I allow myself to feel like one. Sometimes we feel we have failed so much in life that we even feel there is nothing good we can do for God and since we never try to do anything we end up imagining that we have failed God.
This words of Jeremiah give me hope that failure is not defeat
Remember my affliction and my wandering, the wormwood and bitterness. Surely my soul remembers and is bowed down within me. This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. "The LORD is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I have hope in Him."
(Lamentations 3:19-24)There is hope because God is God.God did not restrain me from failing either because I deserved to fail since you I not choose to obey Him, or because He wanted to teach me something, to cleanse me, make me more like Him. It is part of the discipline, the "child-training" of those who belong to the Lord.All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet [walk righteously!]....
(Hebrews 12:11-13)In all this I press toward the mark of the price of a higher calling. Those who keep looking back at their failures will never win the race set before them. We can evaluate where and how we failed for the purpose of learning and growing; however, the past is never to be our focus. If it is, it will cripple our future. As we look at failure, we need to understand why we fail and when we fail.So having said all this, what do you do when you fail?1. Run to God and ask Him why, if you do not know.
2. If God shows you that you failed because you erred or sinned, confess your sin or your failure. Name it for what it is. Then make it right with God and with man, if necessary. It helps to clear the air.
3. Throw yourself on God's mercy. Ask His counsel.
4. Remember the character of God. Remember His promises — cling to them. You have His promise if you cling. Psalm 119:31 says "I cling to your testimonies; O Lord do not put me to shame." The secret to recovering from failure is to continue to cling to your God. We are here to teach you to cling to Him...and not let go. I urge you to go deeper into His Word this year. Number your days, discipline yourself to be a man or a woman of the Lord. When the test, the trial or the temptation comes, you can overcome. "...This is the victory that has overcome the world-our faith" (1 John 5:4).
